


Signs

by creativwritingmind



Series: Three [26]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-12
Updated: 2017-03-12
Packaged: 2018-10-03 04:31:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10235945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/creativwritingmind/pseuds/creativwritingmind





	

Loves leaves us blind, people use to say. Still I knew that this was only part of why Tyler couldn't see what had happened. The other part was that he lacked the experience to read the subtle signs I should have been aware of way sooner. But as both of us never had been the one to pry into each others relationships it had took me some time too. 

The change went too quickly for the crew to pick up on the cause. One day Tyler and Jenna where serverly in love, the other they struggled. Of course everyone wrote it off as the first potholes on the street to being married their whole life when she started to avoid Tylers presence, and peoples presence alltogether. No one thought about it too much as she stopped watching our shows, or sitting with us in the bus lounge when we played silly games. Everyone figured she just had gotten tired of the touring and needed space for her own. 

Yet, the ones of us that where closer to them recognised the lack of closeness between them spedifically. Tyler had never exactly been the ray of sunshine that brigthens everyones day, but he got worse with the amount of time Jenna started to ignore him. Mark asked him what was wrong at that point, I knew better then to do so soon. He got angry, more then he should, and so no one asked anymore. 

I let whole two weeks go by, observing the subtle changes like Jenna using the bunk that was reserved for her and not squeezing into his anymore, or the way she refused to touch him. Whenever cameras where around she gave a weak smile, let him drap his arms on her shoulder, but the second they were gone she were too, dissapeared like a shadow. 

As much as I didn't wanted to interferre in Tylers very personal life, I started to put two and two together. And that was when I started to read the signs. 

With a pounding heart and shaking hands I confronted him then. Of course he didn't give in right away, but he began to talk as he always did when I just stayed persistent enough. Unfortunatly Tyler was too smart to not recognise that there was more behind my questions than only the demand to know what was going on between him and his wife. 

"Why do you wanna know that?" he asked carefully, cossing his arms above his chest defensivly as I had questioned if Jenna had started to avoid his touch from one day to the other. I shrugged and avoided his gaze, well knowing that a lie would take me nowhere. "What do you want me to see?" he gave again, studying my face. I felt bad for making him suspiscious, but at the same time it assured me that what I thought might really been there. 

Not telling him my intention then I left to speak to her. Tyler trusted me, he prooved it by promising me he'd sit down and wait, not push her or me to tell whatever there was. He had trusted me enough to give me the key card to their room, still I knocked when I came there, waiting for Jenna to open the door. She did, relucantly, after the fourth time I drove my fist at the door. Surprised lookig at me through tired, underlined eyes Jenna frowned. "Ty's not here." she said quietly, tilting her head as I nodded on that. "I know. I wanted to see you." I could tell that she was not comfortable with it, yet we were too good friends to brush me off, so Jenna retreated and made room for me to enter. 

I sat down on the bed, ignoring the black stains of Tyler's paint on the sheets, waiting for her to find her place, which she choosed leaning on the wall, facing me. "If this is about Tyler and me, I'm sorry, Josh, but it's not your buisssness." Shaking my head and locking my trembling fingers together I let my gaze slip to the floor. "It is not. It is about me." I could feel her confusion on that, still she didn't answer and waited for me to get on. Taking a deep breath I started then. "You know that my parents and I used to go to church pretty much, don't you? Well, when I was about nine we befriended a guy there...he had just moved to Colombus after he got divorced from his wife. Joey was a really nice guy...he helped out where he could and was quickly accepted in our community. But...Joey was lonely, you know? He was also quiet cool, listened to awesome music and had videogames. He didn't live very far from us, that's why my parents where ok with me visiting him a lot."

I took a deep breath, another. This was hard on me, harder then it should have been after all this years, still I had to do it to save her. "It was fun...for some time. Until Joey began to show me HOW lonely he really was. Until I was not able to push him back." Jenna gasped then and I could see her getting pale as I rose my head to look at her. "He raped me. And I didn't tell anyone for years. Not even Tyler knows about it. It's just my sister, my therapist and me. And now you." She had started to shake, but I knew better then to stand up and hug her. This was sensitive...Jenna wasn't ready to share yet. 

"That's why I know the signs, Jen. That's why I know what you are doing, pushing everyone who loves you away, thinking you're filthy and don't deserve their love. That's why you give Tyler a hard time, because you're afraid he would find out otherwise and leave you." "I have no idea what you are talking about!" she tried to deny then, but the tears in her eyes spoke another language. I hated to do this to her, to break her open, but I knew to well how suffocating it was to keep such things inside, not talk about them. It had took me years to learn that it was a mistake to do so, and I just wanted to spare her that realisation, so I got on unfazed. 

"Jenna, you use the bathroom like five times a day to take long showers. You've changed the way you dress, and don't give me that shit about feeling comfy, I know how much you liked those dresses and shoes and thight shirts. You have stopped eating and if you do you throw up later. You panic everytime Tyler tries to touch you, you're just pretty good at hiding it behind a mask of annoyance." Her tears were flowing freely now, still I couldn't stop. I knew I had to take her to the breaking point to get her to talk, and as much as I hated myself for it in this moment, I knew it was for the better in the long run.

"I've been there, Jenna, I've done that. And as much as I would love to tell you it works...it doesn't. All that water won't make you feel more clean and all that starving won't make you feel more alive. There's only one thing you can do. You need to accept it. Talk about it. Tell Tyler, or your mum or even me. Just talk." Sliding down on the wall wrapping her arms around her knees she started to sob then, loud, uncontrolled, her body shook by the force of her breakdown. Yet I didn't stand up, got near to her. I knew how much she hated to be touched right now. I had hated it myself. 

"I will be there, Jen, always, and Ty will be there and everybody else. And no one will think you're filthy or less worth or some fucked up shit like that. You're a victim Jenna, just like I was back then. But you can get better. You can get controll over it. All you need to do is to stand up and face it, and I swear to you it will fade. It will never go away though...but it will make you stronger...it has made me." 

I stood then, ready to leave her alone with her thoughts, because that was what she needed right now. When I layed my hands on the door knob she stopped me, her voice small and full of fear. "Will you tell Tyler?" she asked, not raising her head to meet my eyes. "Of course not. It's up to you if you want to share. But I'll be there if you'll need me, ok?" Taking her whispered "Thank you!" as another sign I left. 

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Jenna took her time after that and I couldn't blame her. Nearly three weeks went until Tyler stepped up to me one day, when I was rummaging through my bag, and just pulled me close, hugged me and didn't let go for a while. I could feel his tears in my neck, knew that she already had told him what happened, and that it hurted him as much as it did hurt me. "I'm so sorry." he said finally, when he pulled back, "And so thankfull. I...I don't even want to think about what would have happened if you hadn't told her that...you saw the signs." 

With the hint of a smile I starred back at him, realising that maybe what had happened to me had a good outcome in the end. At least I had been able to save Jenna from herself.


End file.
